Teaching a Child with ADHD: Help for the Homeschool Mom

We all have heard it taught in our churches: “Start children off on the way they should go, and even when they are old they will not turn from it” (Proverbs 22:6). For some homeschool parents, this is the verse they hold on to not just for their children’s individual faith in Christ, but for their children’s education as well.

Perhaps the reality of homeschooling isn’t always what you had envisioned. The romanticized idea of having structured lessons, students who excel because of your individual attention, and the epic field trips have sometimes given way to tantrums, frustration, and thoughts of giving up.

Teaching your children at home can be and is rewarding. It can benefit both parents and children. The parents benefit because they feel more invested in the educational development of their child while also being comfortable with the whole curriculum being used.

For the child, the extra time with their parent builds a better relationship with their parents while helping them feel safe and secure as they grow and enjoy learning at a unique pace that is tailored to their individual learning style. Yet when you throw ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) into the mix, your perfect curriculum and curated calendar can go out the window.

The Issue

As a parent of a child with ADHD, you probably already know that children with ADHD often struggle with focus, impulse control, and organization. While this can cause struggles with everyday life at home, these byproducts of the disorder may feel overwhelming in the homeschool context.

Your child may forget instructions halfway through their assignment. They may fidget constantly or become easily overwhelmed by seemingly simple tasks. These challenges can feel magnified in a homeschool environment, especially when the parent is also the teacher, principal, and support staff.

Moms often carry the weight of feeling like they’re not enough or aren’t doing enough, or worse yet, that they are doing everything wrong. You love your child deeply, but there are days when you wonder how much longer you can do this dual role of “mommy” and “teacher.” You see other homeschool families thrive on Instagram, but your reality feels like controlled chaos on a good day. And just plain old messy, overwhelming chaos on most days.

You’re not alone. You aren’t the only person who has struggled with getting a child with ADHD to focus on school or work, or who has had her dreams of idyllic homeschooling crushed by a child who is sitting under the table crying and refusing to study fractions. God isn’t overwhelmed by your chaos, and He meets you right in the middle of it.

Practical Tips

Here are a few ways to help you and your child with ADHD have a more productive, less stressful homeschool experience. While these tips won’t guarantee you a stress-free homeschool environment, they can help you and your child get on the right track to successful learning.

Create a routine (but be flexible)

Creating a flexible routine? That may sound like a contradiction, but it’s not. Children with ADHD thrive when they know what to expect, but they also need room for freedom. Create a daily outline rather than a rigid schedule. Plan to do math first thing in the morning, when concentration is at its maximum. But allow your child freedom within that routine.

Perhaps you can give them the option to do their homework on the sofa or at the table, or even in the hammock. Creating a routine is important, but it’s equally important to give children with ADHD the ability to make a few decisions for themselves within the routine.

Break lessons into smaller chunks

A long worksheet can feel like climbing a mountain for a child with ADHD. Instead, divide daily tasks into smaller parts. Most people with ADHD thrive on bullet points or checklists. It allows them to see at a glance what is expected of them. Five minutes of focused effort followed by a break can accomplish more than sitting through an hour of frustration and refusal.

Another way to help break lessons into more manageable segments is to use visual timers to give your child a clear sense of how long they need to focus. When a child knows there’s a defined end to a task, it can reduce anxiety and increase their motivation.

Make movement a normal part of learning

People with ADHD love to be on the move, so embrace this special style by making it a natural part of your learning plan. Have them read while bouncing on a ball. Let math facts be shouted out while they jump rope. Include a nature walk as part of your science lesson. Hands-on learning helps the material stick, and it meets the need your child has to move.

Celebrate small victories

Did your child finish a worksheet without giving up? That’s a victory! Were they able to sit through a 15-minute reading session? That’s another win! Just as it is helpful to break lessons into smaller, digestible chunks, it’s wise to set attainable goals rather than those that might feel out of reach (for you and your child). Don’t overlook the little things because you are striving for the larger goals. Small steps are building blocks of progress.

Keep fidget toys handy

People with ADHD often concentrate better when their hands are kept occupied. While it may seem like they’re not paying attention if they are fiddling with a toy or tapping their fingers, many children need that movement to focus. Their brains are wired to seek stimulation, and when their hands are occupied, their minds are often more available for learning.

Introduce fidget toys such as stress balls, spinners, putty, or textured cubes. You may be surprised at how much more engaged your child becomes when they’re allowed to move and fidget in a controlled and purposeful way.

Some children may prefer quiet items such as a soft piece of fabric or a stretchy band on their chair. Others do better with items that provide gentle resistance or rhythmic motion. Try a few options to find what suits your child best.

Find their currency

Every child (or should that be person?) has a currency. They have something that motivates them, excites them, or gives them a sense of reward. For some kids, it’s praise and words of affirmation. For others, it’s earning a privilege such as screen time, a special snack, or a reward. Children with ADHD often respond especially well to tangible and immediate incentives.

Take time to observe what lights your child up. Is it stickers? Extra time outside? Getting to choose what’s for lunch or the movie for family night? Use that insight to create a simple reward system.

Maybe they earn a star every time they complete a task without a meltdown, and every five stars equals a trip to the library or a small treat. It doesn’t have to cost money to motivate them; it just needs to be meaningful to them.

Seek professional help

Sometimes love, patience, willpower, and perseverance aren’t quite enough to manage everything. That’s okay. There is no shame in seeking help and admitting that you need a little assistance with your dual role of parent or guardian and educator. Seek professional help through a licensed and professional Christian therapist who can help you understand your child with ADHD more clearly and help you care for your own emotional and spiritual health as well.

Therapy can also help your child learn coping strategies, manage their anxiety, and help them begin to see themselves as more than a label or a diagnosis. ADHD isn’t who they are; it’s just something that they must learn to work within. And with support, they can thrive in their homeschool endeavor and their life beyond.

You can do it!

Homeschooling a child with ADHD can present its own set of challenges. It may require being creative in your teaching approach and finding ways to honor your child’s unique learning style. But isn’t that part of the reason you started homeschooling in the first place? To tailor a learning plan that helps your child grow to be the best possible version of themselves and to live up to the potential that God has for them?

Yes, homeschooling a child with ADHD is not for the faint of heart. It takes true grit, grace, and a whole lot of prayer. But with God’s help, your loving guidance, and some practical support along the way, your child can grow, learn, and flourish. Take a deep breath and reach out for the help you need. And take heart, because you’re doing better than you think you are.

To meet with a counselor regarding teaching your child with ADHD, contact our office today. The counselors in our network are ready to help you and your child thrive.