Why Premarital Counseling in Puyallup Could Save Your Marriage
Tacoma Christian Counselor
Looking for Christian premarital counseling in Puyallup, Washington? We can help. There’s a classic adage that says, “Measure twice, cut once.” Whether you’re into dressmaking, woodworking, sculpting, or 3-D printing miniatures from home, you probably know the importance of getting your measurements just right.
A quarter inch off your mark can ruin hours of work and require either a restart or a major rethink of the project as a whole. Once you press “print” or make that cut, you can’t turn back.
You could say that marriage is like a lifelong project. You meet this person, get to know them, and then at some point, you begin to think it’ll be a great idea to spend the rest of your life with them. You see the path that the Lord has this person on, and they see what the Lord is doing in your life, and you decide to travel it together. This idea is expressed clearly and brilliantly by this quote:
Within this Christian vision of marriage, here’s what it means to fall in love. It is to look at another person and get a glimpse of what God is creating, and to say, “I see who God is making you, and it excites me! I want to be part of that. I want to partner with you and God in the journey you are taking to his throne. And when we get there, I will look at your magnificence and say, ‘I always knew you could be like this.” I got glimpses of it on earth, but now look at you!’” – Timothy Keller, The Meaning of Marriage
If marriage is a lifelong journey, it matters how you begin it. Premarital counseling in Puyallup, Washington can play a significant role in that.
What Premarital Counseling Is and Does
Premarital counseling is a form of talk therapy for couples who are contemplating a deeper commitment toward each other. The couple might already be talking about marriage and have decided to get married, or they’re committing themselves to explore that path. Either way, marriage talk is in the air, and premarital counseling is designed to help a couple think through what that could look like.
Premarital counseling can be done in various ways and through different means. Pastoral counselors in churches offer premarital counseling courses for couples in their church and those from further afield. Counseling can also be offered by trained and licensed counselors through their practice. Counseling can take place online or in person, and the couple can meet one-on-one with the counselor, or in a group with others on a similar journey.
In your premarital counseling sessions, which are typically about an hour long, and you have one or two sessions per week for several weeks, you address particular questions. These questions can range from discussing your understanding of marriage, where you stand on issues like divorce, and what constitutes infidelity. Other questions include how you’ll handle your spiritual lives as a couple and individuals.
During premarital counseling, your counselor will walk with you as you discuss things that typically come up in marriage. The questions above will likely come up. Other questions include the following:
- What roles will each perform in the marriage? How will you determine who performs what role in the relationship?
- What are your goals as a couple?
- Do you both want children? How many, and do you have an idea of what you’d want your family to look like?
- If you do have children, what could be your parenting philosophy?
- What are your expectations about sex in your marriage?
- How will you handle your finances as a couple?
- Are there any boundaries you have about social media and access to your devices and accounts? Do you have boundaries relating to your in-laws?
- How do you handle conflict, and what’s your response when you’re angry?
These and many other questions may come up during premarital counseling. You may face questions you haven’t considered or haven’t thought about in great detail.
Why Premarital Counseling in Puyallup Could Save Your Marriage
Premarital counseling in Puyallup is a tool that can help you measure twice and cut once. This isn’t to say going through premarital counseling is a foolproof way to avoid marital breakdown, but the chances of any marriage are greatly increased by it. By addressing issues that commonly divide couples and break marriages down, premarital counseling gets you ready for marriage. Asking these questions in advance helps you make a more informed decision.
When you go through premarital counseling, you gain new skills too. You learn how to express your needs and wants, as well as how to listen to your partner with empathy. You grow by working together toward shared goals, and in your ability to resolve problems and conflicts together. Premarital counseling in Puyallup, Washington fosters greater alignment between partners before they embark on their journey.
Lastly, premarital counseling can also help a couple become comfortable with the idea of using counseling to work through concerns. Sometimes, issues that can be resolved by bringing in a counselor, an independent and impartial third party, can escalate unnecessarily.
If a couple willingly goes for counseling, they can more quickly address their issues. Premarital counseling in Puyallup can help the couple create a solid foundation upon which to build their lives.
If you’re considering getting married, reach out to us at Puyallup Christian Counseling to talk with a counselor about premarital counseling in Puyallup. They can describe the process and their approach. By taking steps toward premarital counseling, you’ll be setting your marriage up for success.
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