11 Signs of Anger Issues in Adults

Living with anger is challenging for everyone involved. If you struggle with keeping your anger under control, then your loved ones may feel as if they are walking on eggshells around you. This can create long-lasting effects, particularly on children. Once you recognize the signs of anger issues in adults, you can seek treatment, repair relationships, and focus on moving forward.

11 Signs of Anger Issues in Adults

The signs of anger issues in adults can be scary to observers. Did you grow up in a home with lots of anger? Maybe you were afraid to be in sight of an adult because you never knew when a minor offense could lead to a blowup.

If you spent your childhood in the home of an angry adult, know that you can break that generational curse. You have the power to break those chains. God gives His grace and strength to those who seek Him. Ask God to help you understand your anger and rage, and to learn how to manage them effectively. Utilize available resources to acquire the skills necessary to resolve conflicts, manage anger, and communicate more effectively.

The following is a list of signs of anger issues in adults.

Quick Outbursts

Someone with anger issues tends to lose their temper quickly. They may be perceived as having a chip on their shoulder. They are ready for a fight. Outbursts occur suddenly and can be loud or violent. In some cases, they make a scene when out in public. In others, they may seethe and wait until they get home to take their anger out on family.

Often, their anger leads them to speak without listening and to react without thinking. People tend to avoid others who are quick to get upset.

Intense Anger over Little Things

People with anger issues lose control of their temper over minor things. They display an intense anger or rage over minor infractions. This can appear as screaming, cussing, throwing things, slamming doors, and other objects around. They become loud and even threatening.

Their reaction is disproportionate to the offense in terms of the anger it evokes. For example, someone with anger issues may overreact because dinner burned. They may scream and argue for hours, and in some cases, abuse others.

Ranting and Scolding

When people scold others, it can give them a sense of control. People with anger issues may draw out the conversation by lecturing or scolding for hours. If you were a child raised by an angry adult, you may have had to sit there while your parents berated you for your actions for what seemed like hours. They may come and go from a room, continually yelling or making remarks. They may bring the subject up days, months, or years later as a tool to hurt you.

Out of Control Behavior When Mad

Violent behavior, such as driving recklessly, slamming or throwing objects, and shoving or hitting others, is out-of-control behavior associated with anger. This behavior is abusive to others. It makes other people afraid and can cause severe physical, emotional, and mental distress and trauma.

If you are the victim of someone’s uncontrollable anger, seek help immediately. Someone with anger issues needs help to get to the root of their emotions and learn to manage them, but you need to remove yourself from the situation until that person has healed. Contact a counselor for help.

Feeling Ashamed or Guilty about Behavior

Uncontrollable anger can cause people to lash out at others, and they may then feel shame or guilt over their behavior. The person may physically, verbally, or emotionally abuse a loved one in their anger one day, and then the next day “love bomb” them with things to make up for it.

This behavior becomes a pattern. It is as if they are permitting themselves to lose control, knowing they will regret it later and make amends. The victim in this scenario must break the cycle by seeking help for themselves and the angry party.

Physically or Verbally Abusing Another

There is no scenario where physical or emotional abuse is acceptable. The Bible says not to allow the sun to go down while you are still angry. If you are the victim of abuse, seek help immediately. If you are hurting others while angry, you need to seek counseling. Anger issues will endanger your relationships, and although people might forgive your actions, they will never forget. In some cases, the relationship may be beyond repair.

Before losing control, pause and ask yourself what is really bothering you. Is it really anger over the issue at hand, or is it another emotion that you cannot identify? Seek help to learn the underlying cause and how to manage your anger without harming others.

Relationship Problems

Words spoken in anger can destroy relationships. Lashing out at others or doing things to get back at someone else because you feel they’ve wronged you will not fix a relationship or even the score. Eventually, a loved one will no longer trust you.

For example, a husband with anger issues may lash out verbally at his wife over minor infractions until they have a huge argument, then he may decide to get back at her by sleeping with another woman. The relationship is in serious danger of ending in divorce.

Even if the wife manages to forgive her husband and he vows never to do it again, the offense has caused lasting emotional pain and trust issues. Seek help before anger destroys your relationships with your significant other, children, family, and friends.

People Avoiding You Due to Anger

People distance themselves from others whom they consider “loose cannons.” They do not want to be in the company of someone who makes a scene in public, loses their temper over minor problems, or complains about everything.

If you have been around someone with anger issues, then you know how emotionally draining their behavior is on you and others. You may want to avoid their calls and limit your communication with them as much as possible.

Turning to Substance Abuse

Many people with unresolved anger issues turn to substance abuse and risky behaviors to numb the pain they feel but are unable to manage. Overconsumption of alcohol, drug abuse, reckless driving, and extramarital affairs or sexual deviant acts are all harmful coping mechanisms. Counseling can introduce healthier coping mechanisms and strategies for managing anger without hurting yourself and others.

Experiencing Anxiety and Panic Attacks

Unresolved anger issues can result in depression, anxiety, and panic attacks. Depression is a persistent sadness that can last more than two weeks. Anxiety and panic attacks can have several symptoms:

• Irritability and mood swings
• Racing thoughts
• Rapid heart rate
• High blood pressure
• Trembling
• Chest tightness
• Headache
• Numbness or tingling in hands, feet, or lips
• Difficulty swallowing
• Shortness of breath or rapid breathing
• Feelings of impending doom

Panic attacks can be scary. Learning how to manage anger and anxiety can improve mental health.

Hurting Yourself or Having Suicidal Thoughts Due to Intense Anger

Intense anger can result in impulsive behaviors and intrusive thoughts. If you are experiencing intrusive thoughts, harming yourself, or having suicidal ideations, reach out for help today. Intrusive thoughts can lie. They can convince us that we will never get it right again. Thankfully, Jesus Christ broke those chains. Seek help from a Christian counselor who can point you to the most effective psychological methods and draw you closer in a relationship with God.

Anger Management Therapy

If the signs of anger issues leave you feeling out of control and are causing you to hurt relationships, contact our reception team today to connect with me or another Christian counselor. Treatment is available to manage the signs while getting to the root of your anger. Evidence-based psychology and faith-based principles work together to draw you closer to Jesus while helping you manage thoughts, emotions, and behaviors. Call us today to schedule.