Understanding When to Start Christian Counseling for Your Teen
Vanessa Stewart
Have you ever wondered if there is a perfect age for your teenager to start getting Christian Counseling? The world has become such a complicated place for young people, with an ever-changing social landscape and widespread moral, political, and religious perspectives all around them. Christian parenting is not an easy job at any stage of a child’s life, and for the first few years, that responsibility falls on the parent.
All your children shall be taught by the Lord, and great shall be the peace of your children. – Isaiah 54:13, ESV
When does your child start experiencing Christian counseling?
When a child is young, it is easier to instill Christian values because little children naturally tend to trust, look up to, and rely on their parents for their basic Christian counseling. Moms and dads get used to having superhero status in their child’s life, so getting a small child to follow our religious and moral teaching is much easier.Behold, children are a heritage from the Lord; the fruit of the womb is a reward. – Psalm 127:3, ESV
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Those of us who were born into and grew up in Christian homes probably don’t even remember the first time we set foot in a church, sang our first hymn, or whispered our first prayer. Going to church for a small child is as much a part of normal life as doing chores or going to school. Little kids do all this because it is familiar, and that’s all they have ever known.
Think about what your child does every time just before they eat; they may chant the same prayer, the popular “God bless our food, Amen!” Prayer, right? The same goes for the nightly prayer before bed or that prayer for safety just before you start a journey in the car.
Every Christian parent knows that teaching our little ones is not hard, and most of the time, it can even be a lot of fun.
As your child gets older, though, you will realize that it is becoming increasingly difficult to maintain that authority and guidance over their lives. At some point, they need to be independent of you and want to face obstacles on their own and learn to deal with the outcome or consequences.
Recognizing emotional and spiritual shifts in your growing child
Train up a child in the way he should go; even when he is old, he will not depart from it. – Proverbs 22:6, ESV
The Bible urges us to instill the Gospel in the minds of our children while they are young. The Holy Spirit often uses this early training to call them to Himself. It is not a guarantee of the future salvation of our children but demonstrates the general truth that those early years will have a long-lasting impact on their spiritual growth.
As a child makes that dreaded transition into teenagerhood, typically between the ages of eight and twelve, most parents will notice some radical shifts in that parental bond. Many parents react after they have lost control of their child, making it harder to repair that rift.
At this crucial time in their development, pre-teen children enter a daunting new age of decision-making, problem-solving, and coping, which is a good thing and necessary as a foundation for success in life.
The problem is that as they start to feel these pressures, they need their parents to help them learn to process and cope with the feelings and obstacles that life brings them. This is when they start to experience all those so-called firsts like crushes, dates, or heartbreaks, most often influenced by their peer groups rather than their parents.Some important indicators that your pre-teen child is losing touch with your parental counsel can be:
When your child hesitates or becomes reluctant to talk to or pray with you
If you notice any particularly drastic changes in your teenager’s behavior, try to help your teen do an emotional check-up. You may encourage them to journal about their experiences and anything that bothers them. When your child seems to have withdrawn from other kids or their usual hobbies
When your child suddenly becomes embarrassed to talk about God in public
Peer pressure from other kids who may not share the same beliefs may cause your child to feel embarrassed about being a Christian. You need to help your child understand that it is wrong for anyone to make them feel ashamed of their faith. Teach them ways to show kindness and love to others to reflect the image of Christ so that they can inspire others.
When your child becomes difficult and no longer pays heed to your instructions
While it is important to maintain control and enforce family rules, it is also important to gradually allow them the independence to make decisions while they are still in the safety of your home where you can help them deal with the natural consequences of poor decisions.
When your child suddenly seems tired all the time or struggles to sleep well
Identify possible reasons your child may not be getting a full night’s rest and try to get them back to a healthy sleep schedule. They may need to limit screen time or talk about any stressful or traumatic reasons causing their lack of sleep.
Teenage issues that can be addressed in Christian counseling
As children become teenagers, they face a myriad of challenges that may be difficult for a parent to understand. At a certain point, you may discover that you are out of touch with your teenager. This is completely normal, and many parents will tell you that they can relate.
When you struggle to connect with your child, you may be surprised at how much a trained counselor can help your teen to get off their chest. Christian therapists have the tools to help your child navigate those murky social waters and develop a true, personal relationship with Christ. Remember what scripture bids us as parents:And these words that I command you today shall be in your heart. You shall teach them diligently to your children, and you shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise. – Deuteronomy 6:6-7, ESV
Yes, Christian counseling will be able to cover spiritual and biblical issues your teenager may face, but there are also many other challenges teenagers are prone to.
Issues commonly discussed in teen Christian counseling
- Bullying.
- Anxiety.
- Self-loathing.
- Self-harm.
- Eating disorders.
- Trauma.
- Peer pressure.
But as for you, continue in what you have learned and have firmly believed, knowing from whom you learned it and how from childhood you have been acquainted with the sacred writings, which are able to make you wise for salvation through faith in Christ Jesus. All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness, so that the man of God may be competent and equipped for every good work. – 2 Timothy 3:14–17, ESV
The road to good religious and moral guidance needs to begin as early as possible and good Christian parenting involves admitting that you may not always have the answers your child needs. Growing kids need more than just physical nourishment, we must pay attention to them as a whole, which means their body, mind, and spirit.
Contact us today and connect with a Christian counseling expert who specializes in dealing with pre-teen and teenage issues. Take the first step to helping your teenager live a life in line with God’s instructions for their lives.
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