“Big T” Trauma and “Little T” Trauma: Fact or Fiction?

You may have heard the word trauma in your small group circles or perhaps at church. Even the term trauma-informed has become somewhat of a buzzword in our culture today. But how do you know if you truly have trauma, and if so, what kind?

Another term you’ll hear in the trauma conversation is Big T trauma or Little t trauma. This article will help you sort out the meanings of these terms, understand the symptoms of each, and identify where you or someone you love can get the best care possible.

What is trauma?

According to the National Institute of Health, trauma is characterized by any event that poses harm to one’s physical being, whether it’s actual or threatened, and it can be a one-time event or a series of events. Psychologists agree that the broader trauma experienced by individuals through smaller traumatic events can be just as damaging as a one-time event.

Examples of one-time events might be the loss of a parent, a house fire, or a car accident. These may be what you’d consider Big T trauma events.

Over time, however, as the teen grew up, he heard negative words about himself from one or both of his parents. These daily criticisms were internalized, and he struggles with anxiety, depression, and self-doubt. Known as Little t trauma, these experiences are just as devastating to a person’s emotional well-being.

Is my trauma big T, and how do I know?

While this article is to educate and can’t replace the diagnosis of a trained psychologist, one of the symptoms of a Big T trauma is that your traumatic response was acted on by a one-time catalyst. If you know, for example, that your dad died in a workplace accident, it’s a one-time occurrence that likely triggered a traumatic response in you and in your family members.

Consider what life events may have triggered trauma responses. Some common responses to trauma include feelings of distance or disconnection with others, or losing compassion for others. It can also include being on guard or alert for much of your everyday life and waiting for the proverbial shoe to drop, worried you won’t be able to recover from it. Nightmares and the inability to do things that remind you of the traumatic event are also responses.

Those are just some emotional responses. Other responses might be physical or emotional. They may linger or exist intermittently in your everyday life:

• Explosive anger
• Struggling with intimacy
• Sabotaging a friendship or relationship before it gets serious
• Fear of abandonment or physical harm
• Loss of hope
• Self-blame and shameful thoughts
• Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder

What about little t trauma? Is it serious?

The short answer is yes. Little t trauma is found to be just as, if not more, dangerous to a person’s emotional well-being than Big T trauma.

Research has consistently shown that the trauma response from smaller traumatic experiences causes lasting effects. These Little t trauma occurrences may be any of the following: loss of a pet, a breakup, consistent criticism by a teacher, coach, or caregiver, or being rejected by a friend or co-worker.

While these events may not even be top of mind once you grow into adulthood, many Little t traumas reveal themselves in how a person views himself or herself, whether he or she shoots for high goals in life, or in relationship struggles. Seeing a therapist is the first step to uncovering how a history of trauma has shaped your beliefs about yourself and others.

Lesser-Known Symptoms of Trauma, Big T or Little t

You may have heard about trauma in movies or perhaps at church when someone shares a testimony of a piercing traumatic event that challenged the course of their life. Popular TV shows like “The Voice” or “American Idol” tend to reveal the behind-the-scenes stories of contestants who experienced tragedy in their younger years.

These can be categorized as Big T or Little t trauma, depending on the events and how lasting their effects are. Not to take away from anyone’s personal pain, but it’s good to acknowledge that someone who experienced chronic financial insecurity may also be suffering from Little t trauma and just not be aware of it.

While the Little t trauma symptoms may not be as frequently shared on popular TV shows or in films, they’re nonetheless devastating over the course of someone’s life, even causing generational strain and trauma in some cases.

Here are some of the symptoms you may not have heard about or recognized as being related to Little t trauma:

• You expect little of life and of your own ability to achieve.
• Your entire family was stuck with the same career path, even when no one enjoyed it, and it barely paid the bills.
• Your parents left you alone for a large portion of your childhood to figure out new seasons on your own with little input from them.
• You were humiliated by someone in authority by the way they disciplined you or made you an example before others.
• You struggle to trust people of the opposite gender because you just get the feeling that if you opened up to them, they would turn on you and reject you.
• Your relationship choices seem to be short-sighted, and the people you’ve been in a serious relationship with expect too much from you or don’t treat you with respect.

These are just a few examples of how trauma may be playing out in your life today. However, there are multiple ways that Little t and Big T trauma can impact a person or a family.

Did you know that simply being an observer of someone else’s trauma can also be considered a Little t trauma? You might not have been bullied, but if you were consistently present while others around you were bullied, that has an impact that stays with a person, even if you haven’t recognized it.

How to Respond to Trauma

If you or someone you love seems to be self-sabotaging a relationship they’re in, their own career life, or they’re simply struggling to maintain a sense of hope, getting help is paramount.

While you, as a friend or family member, can’t diagnose them, you can point them to a professional licensed counselor who can compassionately meet with them to support their current needs. Maybe your friend (or you) isn’t ready for counseling or to dig deep into your past; that’s okay.

Taking one step toward wholeness may just be a phone call or an email to a counseling practice. You can ask (or encourage your friend to ask) what to expect at an initial counseling session, what the prices are, and how many counselors are in your area.

It may seem scary to explore the roots of your struggles, but when your life goals are being put on hold or, worse, are devoid of peace and joy, it’s important to look at what’s causing the pain. Remember that admitting a struggle is not a sign of weakness; it’s human to struggle, and it shows personal strength to reach out for help.

Still, if your loved one or you aren’t ready, here are some actions you can take that may be helpful in preparation for when you are ready.

Start a journal Record how you feel when you’re struggling with anxiety, fear, or hopelessness. Write what happened before these feelings came up, and how you’re moving through them.

Call a friend Talking to a supportive friend who isn’t afraid of difficult emotions can be helpful, as long as it’s a friend who is emotionally healthy.

Take a walk Studies show that getting outside for even a few minutes a day to walk can boost emotional and physical well-being. This is a great place to start if you’re not sure where to turn first.

Finally, when you feel ready to explore counseling, we’re here to help. Contact our offices, and someone will put you in touch with a counselor near you for confidential, trained therapy.