Don’t Take the Rage Bait: A Faith-Based Approach to Offense, Anger, and Emotional Traps

Working with teens and young adults – and having a teenage/young adult daughter – I’ve recently been hearing the phrase “rage bait.” Rage bait refers to saying or posting something intentionally provocative just to make people angry and get a reaction. Online, it’s often used to drive engagement – likes, comments, and shares – by stirring up frustration or outrage.

Rage bait in today’s world

In today’s digital world, rage bait shows up constantly on social media, where outrage often spreads faster than wisdom.

Learning not to react emotionally to every provocation, whether online or in person, is an important part of protecting our mental and spiritual health. When I was growing up, adults used different expressions for the same idea. They might say someone was trying to “get your goat” or “get under your skin.” The language may have changed, but the tactic hasn’t.

In fact, rage bait has become so common that it was even recognized by oxford university press as word of the year for 2025. But rage bait isn’t just an internet phenomenon. In many ways, rage bait is simply the modern version of the enemy’s oldest strategy: the bait of offense.

I was reminded of this recently in a lighthearted situation at church. I don’t have biological brothers, but I have several “brothers” at church who occasionally enjoy teasing me. It’s all good fun, but one of them recently seemed determined to push my buttons. He was “rage baiting” me – trying to get a reaction – and when I started getting irritated, he thought it was hilarious.

At that moment, I had to stop and ask myself, “Why are you letting him get you upset? He’s getting the exact reaction he wants.” That situation was funny, but in real life, when people say or do things that truly hurt us, it isn’t always so amusing.

How Satan works

The enemy of our souls uses a similar tactic spiritually. He tries to provoke reactions – anger, offense, resentment – that pull us away from peace and from god’s will.

One Sunday, I was driving to church, and I was recalling a situation, a hurt in my past, that I had not let go of, and by means of which the enemy still had a foothold on. I thought I had let it go, but apparently, I hadn’t, because I was still replaying it in my mind. At that same time, one of my church brothers was in front of me and may or may not have been purposely going slow. (Fortunately, I had time to spare, or I might have had my feathers ruffled.)

I felt as if God was saying, “That’s exactly what the enemy is doing to you. He is setting you up to get frustrated – he’s baiting you.” And by rehearsing old hurts, I was falling for his tactics – again! But I didn’t feel condemnation. I felt God’s gentle conviction and reminder.

Luke 17:1 tells us, “It is impossible that no offenses (or stumbling blocks) should come.” However, although you will encounter offense, you can choose how you will react or respond to it. John Bevere wrote the book The Bait of Satan regarding the topic of offense. It has sold millions of copies because it is helpful and relatable.

The back cover reads, “[this book] exposes one of the most deceptive snares Satan uses to get believers out of the will of God – offense. Most people who are ensnared by the bait of Satan don’t even realize it.”

Bevere talks about how to stay free from offense and escape the victim mentality. If you ask yourself these questions, you may have taken the bait:

• Why am I compelled to tell “my side” of the story?
• How can I fight thoughts of suspicion or distrust?
• What can I do to stop rehearsing past hurts?
• How can I regain trust after someone deeply offends me?

Bevere (2014) says, “We are vulnerable to a root of bitterness. Therefore, we must be prepared and armed for offenses, because our response determines our future.”

We have to constantly remind ourselves when dealing with difficult people or situations that “our battle is not against flesh and blood, (we are not fighting against flesh-and-blood enemies), but against evil rulers and authorities of the unseen world, against mighty powers in this dark world, and against evil spirits in the heavenly places” (Ephesians 6:12).

This means that the struggles or challenges we face as humans are fundamentally spiritual, not physical.

A closer look at the spiritual battle

The nature of the conflict: our struggle is not ultimately with people but with spiritual forces (the devil and his forces of evil).

The real enemy: the devil seeks to divide, provoke offense, and steal our peace.

The right response: because the battle is spiritual, we fight with spiritual tools – prayer, scripture, worship, and dependence on God.

The danger: when we focus only on people instead of the spiritual battle behind the situation, the enemy gains an advantage.

This principle reminds us and encourages us as believers to look beyond immediate, human conflict to understand the unseen, spiritual nature of their struggles.

What God’s word commands

What else can we do as believers? What does the word tell us to do? 

Pay attention to your thoughts

One of the best, most helpful books I have ever read on this topic is Battlefield of the Mind ” by Joyce Meyer. In the book, she tells us to “think about what you’re thinking about.”

She says, “thinking about what you’re thinking about is very valuable because Satan usually deceives people into thinking that the source of their misery or trouble is something other than what it really is. He wants us to think that they are unhappy due to what is going on around them (their circumstances), but the misery is actually due to what is going on inside of them (their thoughts)” (Meyer, 1995, p. 61).

Guard your peace and set clear and healthy boundaries

Setting and maintaining healthy boundaries – with romantic partners, family, friends, or coworkers – helps strengthen relationships, prevent unhealthy dynamics, and in the long run will improve your self-esteem and overall well-being. A great resource on that topic is Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No to Take Control of Your Life by Henry Cloud and John Townsend.

Avoid pointless arguments

2 Timothy 2:23-26 tells us, “Again I say, don’t get involved in foolish, ignorant arguments that only start fights. A servant of the lord must not quarrel but must be kind to everyone, be able to teach, and be patient with difficult people. Gently instruct those who oppose the truth. Perhaps God will change those people’s hearts, and they will learn the truth. Then they will come to their senses and escape from the devil’s trap. For they have been held captive by him to do whatever he wants.” (The Message Bible says, “forced to run his errands”).

Forgive those who have hurt you

If you haven’t forgiven the people you are upset with, you may have fallen into the enemy’s trap. 2 Corinthians. 2:10-11 says, “Anyone you forgive, I also forgive. And what I have forgiven – if there was anything to forgive – I have forgiven in the sight of Christ for your sake, in order that Satan might not outwit us.”

Seek support when needed

If you struggle with anger and/or unforgiveness because of things other people have said or done, talking to a counselor might help you feel less stuck in this situation. Counseling can help you work through conflict, help with boundaries, process hurt, and figure out what you want moving forward. It can be very helpful to talk to someone who is objective and neutral.

Having someone professionally trained to help process it might make things feel lighter for you. If you struggle with the idea of counseling, remember, counseling doesn’t replace faith. Instead, good, Christian counseling supports it.

Rage bait may be a modern phrase, but the tactic behind it is ancient. The enemy still tries to provoke anger, offense, and division in order to steal our peace.

As believers, we must learn to recognize the bait and refuse to take it. We cannot control what others say or do. But when we guard our thoughts, set healthy boundaries, avoid pointless arguments, and choose forgiveness, we deny the enemy the reaction he is looking for, and we gain the upper hand.

Don’t take the bait. Guard your thoughts, protect your peace, forgive quickly, and keep your focus on Christ.